A Toast to Some Girl

Whiskey, preferably.

I'd like to propose a toast; to some girl. 

For it not for some girl, I would probably not care to write about anything.

I probably would not care to bathe.

Or move.

Or breathe. 

Sad, you say? I'll have you know that the most powerful, destructive, influential, and menacing force on the face of the Earth, is some girl. 

There's little need to recap how many slaughtered men, fallen empires and utter destruction has befallen our past all in relation to some girl.

How many rulers, conquerors, inventors, thinkers, and history-altering men were directly influenced into achieving greatness by some girl?

A bunch.

What other motive do we have, as men, to aspire to make something of ourselves? Granted, when we begin our journey into the world of man, we simply conform to society's guidelines and expectations.

We do not know why things are the way they are, we do not know why we have to do the things we have to do, but we accept our world and blindly follow the footsteps of our successful elders.

We continue our eduation, advance in our careers, desire and aquire nice things, and attempt to gracefully move through life as they did. At first glance, one would think we do as such to comply with "society's" standards.

Unfortunately, our motives are deeper--much deeper--than this.

There comes a time, early in our manhood, when we realize all of these guidelines and expectations are actually a road map to the one thing we care about most.

Why do lions roar? Why do birds fly? Why do fish swim?

There comes a time, early in our manhood, when our instinctual core slaps us in the face with its humungous caveman cock. Just like all other animals on this planet, we are here for one thing.

There comes yet another time, early in our manhood, when we realize every self-beneficial move we make somehow links back to our neverending burning desire for the only real pleasure worthy of the word pleasure:

Sex.

Biologically, it is our purpose for living. Let's face it, in some way, shape or form, everything men do, they do for, or because of, women (if you're gay, the same principles apply, just replace the word women with penis).

What would be the point of learning to even speak or walk if sex was not a prospect. If women disappeared off the face of the Earth, I firmly believe the institution of language would sieze to exist. We would be grunting and using hand signals to communicate.

Civilization as we know it would collapse.

The world would be too pointless for chaos to ensue. There would be no war simply because there would be no point in it.

Without women, what reason would we have to be successful? Seriously, think about it. (If you're gay, without women, you would have no friends and the rest of us would beat you up constantly.)

Fine, I believe you do things for you because you want to be a better person (douchebag). But have you ever thought about why you want to be a better person? Every route of desire leads to some girl. Whether it's that one girl, or the hopes of many which fuels your ambition, never underestimate the power of some girl.

That is why there comes a time, later in our manhood, when we realize our successful elders were just horny perverts whom, in their prime, just wanted some ass. And so I toast to some girl, for it not for her, life would be meaningless, and porn would not exist. And that, my dear reader, is a world I just don't care to live in.

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